Choose Your Pain

You’re in a dark room. There are two doors. Behind the door on the left is a hallway paved with fears that you avoid. If you step through that door, you are confronted with reality – rejection, problems, uncomfortable conversations and awkward events. The payoff, however, is grand as fuck – Prosperity, confidence, true happiness, love, wealth, health and all that stuff that you obviously want.

But on the door on the right, are your buddies. They have beers, shots of tequila, Netflix is on in the background, there’s the odd gram of coke and a couple of strippers. It’s a good time, and you can do it every weekend. The end result, however, sucks worse than a broken vacuum. Although it is fun, it isn’t fulfilling. You have to go to a job you despise Monday to Friday, you have no real connection with a real woman, you’re always broke, you look like shit and your confidence is down the toilet – forever.

What a difficult decision to make.

On one hand, you have short-term pain, long-term gain. Then, on the other hand, you have short-term gain and long-term pain.

We are hard-wired to seek the short-term pleasure of the door on the right. This is why it is considered “normal” to complain about Mondays, say “yay it’s Wednesday”, then booze it up on Fridays. Unfortunately, the side effect of people who just do whatever it takes to feel pleasure in every moment is you live a life of more pain. These people are more emotionally driven by reacting to the world around them. They feel like beers to escape from the shitty week at work, instead of proactively doing what it takes to get out of that shithole of a job and find something that satisfies their needs. Instead of working ON their life, they’re too busy working IN their life, which ultimately gives them the life that other people want for them.

You can rely on luck in the hopes of attracting an amazing woman. You can wait for the magical Hollywood moment where you bump into her in a coffee shop. Or you can go out and meet women. What you’ll find is as you get better at it, more opportunities arise with better quality women and you are able to pick and choose the lovely lady who fits you best. The alternative is to get what you’re given and hope to a higher-power (AKA: rely on luck) that she is actually the right one and doesn’t make your life a living hell.

Pain is inevitable. It’s a precursor to growth. You can’t avoid it.

You can suffer through the hangovers of living a life you aren’t happy with.

Or you can confront the fears and do the work in the short term to get the long-term payoff.

That takes boring things – such as discipline, persistence and quietly screaming “fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuuuuuucccckk” in your head every now and then as you do something difficult and somewhat terrifying.

Confront the pains of learning how to create a life of abundance in dating, health, wealth and happiness. Or take the shortcut and get dealt whatever the fuck you are given. Buy a lotto ticket, and rely on luck to change your life, rather than simply changing your life yourself. It’s always your choice – it just depends on what you actually want, who you surround yourself with and the actions you physically take.

Stop living life in hard mode

Life is supposed to be easy.

Life is supposed to be easy – But not in the easy way that you assume it to be.

Once upon a time, you couldn’t walk. You were an infant who couldn’t even roll over. But, over time and with coaching, you eventually figured it out.

However, figuring it out wasn’t easy, it was HARD!

By far, it was the hardest thing you have ever had to accomplish. Fail this, and you have to live a life of crawling around like a gimp in a leather suit or needing to buy a new pair of jeans every week because you wore the knees out of it again. Or (most likely) you’d be stuck in a wheelchair, complaining about how difficult it is to wheel yourself into the back entrance of a pub because you can’t get yourself up the one stair at the front. That’s a challenging life, it’s a pain that you’d have to deal with every day.

But, instead of lying down and being a victim, you learned how to walk and now it’s easy. It’s second nature. It’s a piece of piss. You can even run, skip and ollie a skateboard as you try to be like Tony Hawk.

Life is supposed to be easy. But it isn’t just handed to us on a silver platter, it is EARNED through conscious effort.

“Don’t wish life were easier, wish you were better”.

Then go out and make yourself better.

Or don’t.

But if you’re not willing to make life easier for yourself, shut the fuck up with your complaining – because no one cares. You make your bed and you get to sleep in it.

Whatever it is that you want to be better at, you can be better at it. It’s just a bit of work.

It’s accepting the short-term sacrifice for the long-term gain. It’s eating shit for 3-5 years, then eating caviar for the next 60.

Choose your pain – short-term and temporary, or long-term and soul destroying.

Be an adult. Make the right decision. Go against the grain. Be an anomaly.

Now go out there, and go and do the shit you said you would.

  • November 16, 2017