It was 2012 and I was in the best shape of my life. I was the leanest I’d ever been, was super fit, and strong. I was proud of what I had achieved, and like most guys, I thought the Women would come crawling to me like a bunch of ants sniffing out an uneaten doughnut I reluctantly threw on the ground. I was wrong – Because being good looking is not enough.
In my demented mind, I thought that I’d have ladies throwing themselves at me and making obvious moves. Then I could sit back like Caeser and give her the thumbs up or down, depending on whether she fit the mould or not.
To put it to the test, I ended up going to a music festival. I ended up drunk and had my shirt off – just like the rest of the douchebags. I stupidly figured that if I show it off like a fancy car, that people will come and check it out, and hopefully want to take it for a test drive. Needless to say, I (deservedly) went home empty-handed.
Since I was young, I have always thought that Women only went for the good looking guys. I thought that to be successful with Women, I had to be jacked, shredded and tanned. But when I finally “achieved” those things, I realised that looking great didn’t count for nearly as much as what I thought.
This is a common misconception amongst Men. Unfortunately, it holds a lot of Men back from approaching and meeting Women, simply because they just think that they aren’t hot enough just yet (or at all). Sure, it might motivate them to hit the gym harder, but when they see a beautiful Woman they automatically assume that they’re not attractive enough for her (because you know what a stranger finds attractive – right?)
WHY I FAILED
My failure as a douche without a shirt at a music festival (other than the fact that I was one), came down to several factors that worked together to ensure that I went home alone and had to make love to my fist. These factors are below:
IMPROPER BELIEF SYSTEMS
I have always thought that Women just wanted the good looking guys. I believed that in order to attract amazing Women that I needed to look a certain way, and the rest would happen easily. This, obviously, proved to be false. My years of conditioning and listening to bro’s talk about how their abs get hoes was an inaccurate belief to have. Although your looks definitely do matter to a certain point (will talk about this soon), you still need to go and meet Women.
I NEVER APPROACHED ANYONE
I didn’t walk up to anyone at all. Like an idiot, I just stayed and waited for someone to come and talk to me. I foolishly thought that that is how it works when you’re good looking and are at a meet-market. I simply didn’t do the required work to meet Girls. While you don’t need to be the Pick-Up-Artist-Pussy-Magnet-5000, you still need to demonstrate your availability and interest as a sexual Man. You must approach Women – it is unnatural for wait for them to approach you.
I WAS DISHONEST
I didn’t let any Girl know that I thought she looked amazing. I didn’t want to tell a Girl I noticed her and just HAD to meet her. I didn’t steer a conversation in a way that allowed me to let her know that my intentions were anything but platonic. For the Girls that I did manage to talk to, it was platonic and I hid my desires and intentions.
This makes me a liar.
I am not saying go out and be a predator. But, hey, if you like a Girl and you think she looks amazing, you’re being dishonest if you don’t let her know the real reason why you wanted to talk to her. All of us avoid this level of honesty in an attempt to avoid rejection, but what it actually is, is you playing games. And when you play games to dance around the possibility of a minor rejection, your behaviour attracts people who like to play games, too. If you tend to attract people who lie, it’s because in some way you’re a liar too. (Remember – Like attracts like).
I DIDN’T UNDERSTAND WHAT WOMEN WANT.
I can talk about this topic for hours, and below you can have access to a video series on this very topic.
Most Men don’t have a goddamn clue what Women actually want. They think they know what Women want, but so far I have found that the overwhelming majority of Men miss the mark by a mile.
They think Women want money, cars, a Man with a thick dick and an even thicker wallet. And although those things are a means towards what they truly seek, it isn’t what they are actually looking for.
I had no idea what Women wanted (obviously), but if you understand what they are truly seeking in life, you can easily reverse-engineer yourself to become a Man who naturally attracts them. You’ll stand out from the rest of the Male population and it’ll give you an unfair advantage.
WHILE BEING IN SHAPE ISN’T ENOUGH TO GET GIRLS, BEING OUT OF SHAPE IS MORE THAN ENOUGH TO ENSURE YOU WON’T.
Yep. Being a fatty won’t exactly help you hook up with high-quality Women. The same as being a stinky, obnoxious asshole won’t either. Think Women are superficial moles now? Not even.
The purpose of life is to reproduce. Everything us human beings do is ultimately to perpetuate the species and ensure its longevity. We are hard-wired for reproduction. We build hospitals to save lives and to keep the species going. We seek to build stockpiles of resources (such as money, food, shelter and knowledge) to be used as a tool to provide us with the best lives and living conditions. Hell – Even a terrorist cutting off some poor Western journalist’s head thinks that he is doing the right thing for the species. He (stupidly) see’s westerners as a threat to his way of life and therefore to his children’s longevity too.
All Men seek Women with great DNA – large breasts for milk for the children, wide hips for fewer complications during labour, physical fitness for running away from predators, and not a single red hair in sight! (Sorry, redheads! JK.) All of these traits ensure that the child is protected, nourished and has the best chance of survivability.
If you’re someone who doesn’t look after their body, it demonstrates that you:
- Don’t value yourself. (So why should she?)
- You can’t fend off predators. (For when the psycho or the bear comes into your cave).
- You lack discipline. (Potential unreliability as a mate).
When you display these traits in the form of obesity, it reduces your mating value because Women seek safety. They can’t feel safe around a guy that can’t protect them or provide for them – especially when she is 8 months pregnant. So it’s very unlikely that she will let you diddle her pooter in the first place.
Having some level of health and general fitness is more than enough to demonstrate that you are a Man who can provide her safety. You have the ability to provide resources such as food, shelter and water – because you aren’t stuck to the sofa.
After chatting to a lot of girls, when they see someone who looks like a motherfuckin’ Adonis, a lot of them are under the assumption that they’re an insecure narcissist or that they’ll spend too much time in the mirror to want to spend any time with them at all.
You don’t need to become a fitness model because sometimes those models are insecure little boys stuck in a big Man’s body. How can she trust a Man who frets about how other people perceive him? If he values other people’s opinions over his own (AKA: Has low confidence) what is stopping him from potentially abandoning her if some other girl gives him attention?
Being healthy is fine. Trust me.
Yes, some Women like the big, hunky ripped guy. But what you’ll probably find is that she is super fit and hot too – That’s not because she’s superficial or stupid, they both probably value health and fitness. (And a relationship is the joining of people with similar values.)
Physical attractiveness is simply a physical display of good DNA. Search google for “Good Looking Man” or “Good Looking Woman” – you’ll notice the people have similar traits that we collectively define as “attractive”. It’s attractive because it provides mating value. Everything that is considered attractive directly relates to your ability to reproduce and ensure the survivability of the child.
Men think that being physically attractive counts for more than it really does. Even if you’ve been molested by the ugly stick more than once, you still have a lot more hope than you think. Attractiveness isn’t just about looks – it’s about your ability to (one day) be able to provide, support, nurture a family, perpetuate the species and give the younglings the best chance of survival.